Posts tagged "rant"
The Great Google+ Swindle

The Great Google+ Swindle

Do you want to use Google+? The answer is probably a resounding "no!" But thanks to Eric Schmidt and leading bloggers, you'll feel like you have to. Welcome to the great Google+ swindle.
What The US Presidential Election Can Teach You About B2B Copywriting

What The US Presidential Election Can Teach You About B2B Copywriting

Can Barack Obama's re-election really tell us all there is to know about the subject which I write about?
Would It Kill You to Be Nice?

Would It Kill You to Be Nice?

For some reason, the internet is making us incredibly angry. It's making us argue past the point of reason. It's making us set up fake Twitter accounts to harass the outspoken. And it's making us avoid the comments section of websites, because we're afraid of what we'll find down there.
Please Stop Verbing Your Nouns

Please Stop Verbing Your Nouns

I'm part of the generation that was never formally taught English grammar. I don't know what adverb means, I think pronouns sound slightly seedy, and that conjunction is something that happens in a car park outside a prison.
Five Suffixes That'll Make you Look Like a Moron

Five Suffixes That’ll Make you Look Like a Moron

Suffixes are superb inventions. They can take a boring, humdrum word and turn it into something wonderful. Using the right suffix will help you create unforgettable portmanteaus that hook the reader and don't let go. But if you use the wrong suffix, you can come across a a pretentious, preening pillock with no grasp of the...
Why I'm Seriously Losing Pinterest

Why I’m Seriously Losing Pinterest

Last week, I was confronted with something horrible. Somebody that I follow on Twitter had re-tweeted a blog post by a mutual acquaintance. Someone whose posts I love to read... I clicked. I took one look at the post, and hammered the back button. Then hit unfollow.
How Not to Write a Sales Letter (with assistance from cuddly Ken Bates)

How Not to Write a Sales Letter (with assistance from cuddly Ken Bates)

Despite telesales, despite search engine marketing, and despite social media, direct sales letters are still one of the most important and effective weapons in any marketer's arsenal. Done right, a great sales letter can deliver huge returns on a fairly small investment.
An Open Letter to Google on the Subject of Social Search

An Open Letter to Google on the Subject of Social Search

Dear Google, It's me, Andrew. I know that we haven't always seen eye-to-eye, especially when it comes to your muppet fixation and your inexplicable need to give me yet more buttons to click, but I really need to tell you something.
5 Apocalyptically Bad Topics I Don't Want to See in 2012

5 Apocalyptically Bad Topics I Don’t Want to See in 2012

2012 is finally here. The year of the London Olympics, the Golden Jubilee and, most concerningly, the end of the world. If the misinterpreted non-prophesies of a dead Mesoamerican civilisation are to be believed (they're not), then the world will end in some horrible manner on December 21 2012 (it won't).
Do You Know What's The Scariest Thing About Halloween?

Do You Know What’s The Scariest Thing About Halloween?

Apparently, the week surrounding October 31st is the scariest time of the year. But it's not because of trick or treaters. No, it's because of hellishly bad copy. So read on and find our Bestiary of Halloween Copy Horrors. If you dare...
An SEO Copywriter Walks Into a Pub...

An SEO Copywriter Walks Into a Pub…

An SEO copywriter walks into a pub, bar, public house, venue, beer, lager, wine, spirits, cocktails, pub food, gastropub, happy hour... And how we laugh. Still. Every time this tired old joke wheezes its way around Twitter, we all drop to the ground, rolling about in paroxyms of laughter, attempting to hold in our ruptured and...
You're Not a Ninja, You're a Fool

You’re Not a Ninja, You’re a Fool

Names and titles are important. When you've got a split-second to make an impression, you need to explain clearly and concisely just what it is that you can do for a client.