Unmemorable Title

Should You Play It Safe?

Andrew — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 14:00:45 +0000

Photo by Orin Zebest

I’d like to share an anecdote with you. I’d just started out as a junior copywriter, and spent my days writing quick copy samples for potential clients. Not glamorous or particularly exciting, but exactly the sort of thing that teaches you to write for a variety of audiences.

One sample that sticks in my mind was for a clothing company. They had a MySpace page, a strong design aesthetic and a quirky name. The theme running through all three was a post-apocalyptic flavour that pulled in phrases and themes from old Cold War propaganda.

Just my cup of tea. So I set to work and crafted my sample. I went to town. Sound effects, wailing sirens. The lot. Something that I thought would at least demonstrate to the client that we knew where they were coming from.

It got pulled up by one of the senior guys. Some of my wording contained negative connotations, so he thought I should re-write it in a more upbeat manner. More sedate. Closer to the more corporate copy we produced most of the time.

I did what any young and inexperienced writer would do. I took the feedback on board, rewrote the sample and sent it on to be presented to the client.

They never signed up for the service.

I often wonder if sticking by my original piece would’ve had a different outcome. Whether taking that risk would have paid off where playing it safe didn’t.

I’m almost certain that it would have.

Is Your Professional Voice Boring?

Andrew — Sun, 28 Feb 2010 12:50:05 +0000

This is Jim. Jim is a professional musician.

Jim is exciting, innovative and all sorts of other interesting superlatives.

Jim isn’t boring.

So if a professional isn’t a boring person, why is your professional copy boring?

The Reputation of the Professional Voice

Too many writers see the word “professional” on a brief and sigh. Professional just doesn’t seem to fit with words like “exciting” or “innovative”. For some reason, when a client asks for a professional tone, they tend to ask for something long, dense and packed with jargon. Something that fills the copywriter with dread.

Now go and watch that video clip again. That’s a professional musician doing his job. He’s entertaining and unique. That’s how your professional voice needs to speak for your client.

How to Write in the Professional Voice

If you’re going to excite and enthrall readers with your professional voice, you need to bear a few things in mind.

Professionals know what they’re doing. Take a position of authority. Be bold, and be convincing. If you’re writing for an industry expert, don’t write that “they believe” or “they think”. Make a statement.

Professionals can back up their claims. That doesn’t mean making a huge list of qualifications, written in impenetrable acronyms. It means demonstrating real-world experience. It means demonstrating relevant accreditations as part of your copy.

Professionals lead the way. Take a look at that video again. A professional defining himself by doing things in his own way. our client needs to do that. Unique Selling Points are the key to convincing professional copy.

It’s that simple. So the next time you need a professional voice, don’t think that 10,000 words of dry wording sprinkled liberally with acronyms will cut it. Be authoritative, use evidence and carve your own niche.

Copify – The Debate

Andrew — Tue, 09 Feb 2010 21:40:24 +0000

I’m too ill to recap the whole debate, but if you want some background on the Copify issue, here’s a quick-n-dirty guide to where in the Blogosphere the debate is happening.

Twitter

Search Twitter for Copify – you’ll get a rough idea of what’s going on.

Unmemorable Title

Whilst not strictly about (but obviously inspired by) Copify, my post on Paying Copywriters by the Hour has a decent conversation attached.

Ben Locker & Associates

Ben weighs in with what could be described as “cheap traffic bait” or “insightful comments on just how Copify have riled people up”. I favour the latter description, but judge for yourself: Copify, Unprepared to sell Cheap Copy?

ABC Copywriting

Fresh from his Guardian Liveblogging adventure, Tom gives us his two pence worth (if that’s taken literally, it’s much cheaper than 2p per word) and raises an interesting point regarding Google. Read his piece on the perils of content mills.

Lemondrizzle

Don’t think this is purely a copywriting issue. We’ve got comments from the world of PR too. Copywriters. Just how much are you worth?

The Drum

Larner Caleb is right on the money, in hilarious fashion with his sarcastic swipe at content farms, Copify and the cash per word scandal. Is the pen mightier than the sword when it comes so cheap?

Copify Blog

In the name of fairness, and because it’s only right that the company in question get their say, here’s what Copify have to say on the subject.

Oh, and one last link. Just for giggles. Here’s what one half of Copify has to say about the web developer who designed their site.

Before you ask -

Yes, MJR Web is the poster who’s replying on behalf of Copify on the above blogs (with his official Copify email address no less).

No, I don’t know if he wrote his own testimonial or asked his business partner to do it for him, but I think it’s a great tactic nonetheless.

No related posts.

Should You Pay Your Copywriter by the Word?

Andrew — Mon, 08 Feb 2010 13:50:55 +0000

Photo By Ecastro

Twitter has been all aflutter this weekend, with a brand new “copywriting agency” following all and sundry. They’ve been promising the untold riches of £0.02 per word and have met with responses ranging from the amusing to the incredulous.

@SarahCopywriter £0.04 per word! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, (breath) ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! F**k me, the last of the big spenders!

But does the problem lie with the sum being offered, or the way that it’s being offered? When you’re hiring a copywriter, should you be paying them by the word?

I say no.

Why You Shouldn’t Pay Copywriters by the Word

If you want my services, or those of any good copywriter, then you’re best off forgetting the notion of paying per word. Why?

Because it’s not the best way to source good copy.

What Exactly Are You Paying For?

The main misconception you have when you’re hiring a copywriter is that all they do is write words. You’re wrong. If all we did was sit at a keyboard and start typing, there’s no way we’d produce coherent and convincing copy. We need to research your industry. Think about your target audience. Before our pens get within a mile of our paper, we need a clear idea in our heads about how we’re going to approach your copy.

You want us to skip that bit? You want us to dive in headlong without stopping to think?

Or do you want well thought out, well planned and well put together copy that will bring you business?

Do You Want Verbosity or Clarity?

“When I stop and think about it, the conclusion is reached in my mind that perhaps it is not always the longest and most wordy (if wordy is indeed a word) copy which is the most convincing to clients and prospective customers. In fact, I’m inclined to believe that it is the copy of a shorter and concise nature that really draws, holds and keeps the attention of the reader. This, I’d imagine, makes the notion of paying per word counterintuitive.”

“Concise copy keeps clients focused. Long copy can bore them. You want convincing copy, so don’t reward rambling.”

Do you honestly think that the first piece is worth more to your company? Do you think it’s going to attract more business?

Or do you want to reward compelling copy, regardless of how many words it took to construct it?

Do You Want to Come Across as a Cheapskate?

Numbers are funny things. As soon as a pound sign gets involved, we want to see the highest possible number.

But here’s the thing. I won’t sit there and do the maths to work out whether an offer is good or not. If you turn round and tell me that my time is worth a fraction of a penny, I won’t read to the end of the proposal.

It’s that simple. If you’re not showing someone the highest possible figure they could be earning, you’re not going to convince them. You wouldn’t advertise a permanent contract as paying “0.0027p per second”, would you?

No, you’d advertise it as £20,000 per year and watch the applicants roll in.

So How Should You Pay a Copywriter?

By now you should’ve realised that paying by the word isn’t the best way to attract a talented and committed copywriter. So you’ll be wondering what to offer. Well the easiest way is to ask your copywriter what they’re expecting. Do they charge by the hour? By the piece? You wouldn’t walk into a garage and tell a mechanic you’d pay him by the number of bolts he tightens – you’d ask him for a quote to do the work you want.

Keep your original figure in mind, compare it to the copywriter’s charges and see if you can reach an agreement. Then sit back, wait for your first draft, and congratulate yourself on money well spent.

And if you visit the chippy on the way home, take a look at their prices. I bet they won’t be charging you per chip.

The Writing Secrets Conspiracy Theorists Don’t Want You To Know

Andrew — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 12:28:02 +0000

Photo by The Sunday Sport

This post will change your life. It will shake your beliefs to the core.

Make sure you read this quickly. I’m not sure how long it’ll stay up before the CIA, Illuminati and those Lizard Men that David Icke dribbles about will find this and shut it down.

The information I have to share with you is so sensitive, I dare not put it on the front page of my website. So check who’s standing behind you, run your spyware filter and prepare to clear your cache. Then click more. Good Luck.

The Writing Secrets of the Conspiracy Theorist

Aliens walk amongst us. Elvis Presley works in a chip shop. American Presidents, British Monarchs and anyone who’s ever been in a synagogue are linked in a secret operation that controls everything (Except this blog, the true voice of truth and trueness!).

When a random drunk stumbles up to you in a pub and blurts out any of the above, you ignore him. Yet thanks to the wonder of the internet, magazine articles and careful use of language, those claims are some of the tamer things that people actually believe.

Why? Because whether they know it or not, conspiracy theorists are some of the best copywriters around. And whether you believe their claims or not, you should be listening closely to what they have to say. It will improve the effectiveness of your copy.

Be Bold

Have you ever seen a conspiracy site that starts like this?

“We think, that on the balance of probabilities, man probably hasn’t been to the moon.”

If you have, you won’t remember it. Flaccid, weak statements don’t draw your reader in. They don’t instil confidence. Worst of all, they just aren’t convincing. Be brash and bold. A strong opening line gives your claims authority. And as any good conspiracy theorist will tell you, people like following the instructions of an authoritative voice.

Be Sane

The reason I chose the picture above is because it illustrates just how insane conspiracy theories can be. Yet copywriters make the exact same mistake.

“Miracle product is guaranteed to make you look ten years younger, help you live ten years longer and will have buxom young ladies queuing round the block!”

Yeah. Sure. Your audience really isn’t buying that. If you can’t make a sane claim, you’ve lost your authority. If it helps you look younger, say that. Let customers know that it “visibly delays the onset of ageing.” They’ll be much more inclined to believe you.

That said, if you built up enough authority, you’ve got about five seconds to get the reader back onside. Luckily, our Conspiracy Theorists have another trick up their sleeve.

Present Evidence

Your copy can be sane and strong, but there’s one more thing you need. No matter how outlandish your claim, you can make it seem sensible with the application of evidence.

The right evidence is key. It needs to be accessible, understandable and convincing. Nobody ever says that almost a fifth of people thought their product didn’t work, they tell consumers that 80% of people interviewed saw real results.

Admittedly, they never tell you that most of those interviewees work in the advertising department, but knowing just how much evidence to give is key. 9/10 marketing professionals agree.

Don’t Worry About Skeptics

Finally, the most important thing you can learn from conspiracy theorists is this. This is the part that changed the way I think about copywriting and blogging.

You are not going to convince anyone. Even in your target audience. I won’t believe the moon landings were faked until Neil Armstrong comes to my house and tells me himself. Some of your customers won’t believe your car is a chick magnet until they see toothless Bob driving past with Carey Mulligan riding shotgun.

So don’t waste your time on him, and don’t waste your time on me. Focus on the people that want to believe you. The ones who think that the truth is out there.

Give them a bold, authoritative piece. One that makes claims that they can believe, backed up with convincing evidence. And then make sure it speaks to them.

That’s the real secret behind all these global conspiracies. Great writing, and the ability to find the right audience.

Don’t print this off. If you do, shred it after reading. I’ll leave the comments enabled, but if you post now it’s on your own head.

Hang on. Is that a knock at the door?.

When he’s not listening to The Conspiracy Skeptic Podcast or laughing at tinfoil hats, Andy’s been known to write copy for a range of companies. If you need some sane and sober content that speaks to your customers, get in touch.

History – The Copywriter’s Degree?

Andrew — Thu, 21 Jan 2010 22:01:54 +0000

Santa Maria de Avià by Reinante El Pintor de Fuego

“What education do you need to become a copywriter?” I’ve seen this question asked a few times in the past few weeks. The usual suspects have all reared their heads – English, Psychology, Journalism. I’ve got some different advice. If you want to know what degree to take to learn the copywriter’s skills, do what I did.

Become a Historian.

History – The Copywriter’s Degree?

Not all copywriters study English. Some of the best I’ve worked with studied photography, or performing arts. But if you’re looking for a degree with skills that translate into good copy, history is where it’s at.

Research – The Key to Adaptability

If you’re unlucky, at some point in your career you’ll hear the following sentence:

“How can you write about [complex industry] if you’ve never been a [complex industry worker]?”

The answer to that is simple. It’s exactly the same way you can write about the 1917 Bolshevik Revolution even though you were born in the Eighties. Research. If you’re going to write about industries you don’t have any first hand experience of, you’ll need to read up on them first. History prepares you for this. You learn which sources you can trust, which accounts are unusable due to bias, and how to tell the two apart.

Exercise Those Writing Muscles

Turning disparate information into compelling arguments. That’s a sentence that sums up copywriting as well as it sums up a history course. And you’ll get more than enough practise.

Essays with strict word counts, exams where you need to be concise, convincing and compelling, and a dissertation where writing consumes your entire life. Those three things make history the perfect degree for prospective copywriters.

Travel The World, Meet New People

A bit of life experience enriches your copy no end. Unfortunately, if you’re straight out of university your life experience probably extends to 2-4-1 drinks offers, home remedies for Fresher’s Flu (whisky mixed with honey cough medicine, if you’re asking) and which local pubs offer a free sandwich on pub quiz night.

Luckily, as a historian you’ll be able to call upon the life experiences of thousands of people from across the world. Ok, your recall of French munition production in the lead up to Verdun might not help – but the hopes, dreams and fears of generations past can help make anything a riveting read.

If you’re a student looking for advice, or you’re a copywriter wanting to make a case for your degree, join in the discussion below.

Your Blog Bores the Arse Off Me

Andrew — Thu, 14 Jan 2010 21:00:58 +0000

Photo by Andrew Nattan

Hi there. You don’t know me too well, but maybe you should. I’m your audience. I’m the guy who subscribes to your blog via RSS, retweets your posts and leaves you the odd comment. But let me tell you a secret. I’m doing those things more out of habit at the moment. Why?

Because your blog is boring me to tears. And if you don’t get a grip, then it’s over between us.

Is Your Blog Boring Your Audience?

It’s not that I don’t want to hear what you have to say, it’s that you’re just not engaging me the way you used to. And if I’m not engaged with what you have to say, then I’m not going to do what you want me to. But don’t worry. We’re going to work things out. I’m going to show you where you’re going wrong, and you’ll thank me for it when you see more subscribers, more retweets and more comments.

Could You At Least Look Like You’re Making An Effort?

Let me share this with you first. When I’m scanning my RSS feed, or clicking onto a link I’ve been sent, I’m not going to be drawn in by a wall of text.

Give me something that attracts my attention. A picture will do. It doesn’t have to be a work of art, just something that’s appropriate to your headline and that stands out. If you’re lucky, you’ll have something like that lying around. A picture of a bored-looking friend perhaps?

If not, what’s stopping you heading over to Flickr? There are people there just dying to get their work seen.

Take five minutes to find the right picture. It’ll work wonders when it comes to the all-important first glance.

It’s Not You. It’s Me.

It really is all about me. Sure, share your thoughts and opinions with me. I like that. But don’t just talk yourself. Talk to me directly. Address me. Communicate with me.

And you know what’s worse than when you only talk about yourself? When you don’t talk about anyone. When you tell me what’s good for “bloggers“, or “readers” or “the man on the street“.

If I feel like you’re talking with me, I’m more likely to talk back.

My Time Is Precious

I appreciate that you’ve got lots to say, but I don’t have the time to read your five thousand word treatise on the future of SEO, or your novella on copywriting mistakes.

I’ll tell you what does impress me though – concise articles that are packed to bursting with information, advice and ideas. If you can condense all that wonderful content down into a bite-sized chunk, I’ll love you for it.

Keep what you need to say brief, and I’ll read to the end. The less time I need to spend reading and dissecting your post, the more time I’ll have to tell all my friends that what you have to say is worth reading.

So Then? Can We Give This Another Go?

So now I’ve got that off my chest, what do you say? Will you catch my eye with some illuminating illustrations? Will you engage me in conversations instead of lecturing me from the pulpit? Will you keep it short and to the point, so I’ve got the time to read what you’ve worked so hard to write?

If you do, I promise I’ll be a better reader. I’ll subscribe, I’ll promote and I’ll talk back.

Just let me know. What do you say?

Is Google Automatically “Correcting” English Spelling?

Andrew — Wed, 13 Jan 2010 12:56:46 +0000

All the buzz surrounding Google today is concerning the fact that they’re attempting to play hard ball with the Chinese government, and the havoc caused by the imminence of the caffeine update.

What only a few souls have noticed is that Google are attempting to force American spellings onto an unsuspecting British populace.

Google UK. The whole point of it, is that it provides information tailored to UK searchers. So it’d make sense that it defaults to the local language, right?

It certainly does in France and Germany. If you put “chien” into Google.fr, it doesn’t return a comment asking you if you meant “dog”. For some reason it doesn’t treat British English in the same way.

Imagine my surprise when I clicked on a Tweet this morning that took me to this page:

The searcher asked for “search engine optimisation”. All those words are highlighted, so they are in Google’s dictionary and recognised as words. So why did Google return a search on the query “search engine optimisation”?

This isn’t an isolated incident either. I tried a few single word searches. “Colonisation” for example works fine, But when I started to search for terms with more than one word, the defaulting to Americanisms reared its star spangled head.

So what does this mean? Are Google having trouble with their automatic spellchecker, or is it something more sinister? I wouldn’t for a moment entertain the notion that Google are attempting to create some sort of linguistic hegemony, but is it possible that they’re working to some sort of sinister agenda?

I’m not the only person to notice the creeping Americanisation, but there’s no concensus on why it’s been done. Dodgy spell checking? Cultural imperialism? Search volumes?

I’ll leave that with you…

On Apostrophes

Andrew — Mon, 11 Jan 2010 21:39:30 +0000

Beware: The following clip contains slouching, terrible hair and a hint of mental ranting.

For the FirstFound Newsletter, I was asked to record a New Year’s Resolution. It turned into a bit of a rant, and I may have been the only staff member to use a prop.

It’s sound advice though. If you don’t know whether or not to use an apostrophe, don’t bother.

No related posts.

Android Apps I Just Couldn’t Live Without

Andrew — Fri, 08 Jan 2010 13:43:38 +0000

Over the past few months, I’ve noticed that I’m using my mobile phone (HTC Hero, if you care) more for surfing the internet than I do for making calls and sending texts. This is either representative of a shift in the way people use the internet, or just conclusive proof that I don’t have many friends.

Either way, the first thing you notice as a mobile phone surfer is that you want to spend as little time as possible using the handset’s web browser. Sites have absolutely terrible mobile versions, and the browser refuses to run in the background.

If you’re going to use the internet on the move, you’ll need Apps. So here are the Android Apps I just couldn’t live without.

For Tweeting: Swift

For weeks, I plodded along with TwiDroid. I hated it. It made the box standard “Peep” application look like the pinnacle of coding development. So I deleted it, installed Swift and never looked back. It lets me do everything I do on my desktop, which is all I wanted from it in the first place.

Swift lets you load internet pages up in the app. Words can’t express how much of a timesaver that is. Other than that, it works quickly, very rarely crashes (Take note TwiDroid!) and generally lets me keep up with my network when I’m out and about. It’s also been very useful in the snow, as @MatthewHill has to brave the Manchester Metrolink before I do.

For Keeping in the Loop: NewsRob

It’s the most reliable RSS feeder I’ve found for Android, and it integrated perfectly with my Google Reader. If you need to know the benefits of having instant access to your RSS feed when you’re on the go, then you’ve never spent hours waiting for a train. Just fill it with a mixture of entertaining, insightful and interesting feeds and watch the hours fly by.

For Finding Things to Do: FourSquare (for Android)

I’ll admit, I’m addicted to FourSquare. Maybe it’s the xbox geek in me that likes unlocking achievements just for buying a sandwich, or maybe it’s the sneaking suspicion that Roger Davies might well be right, but I can’t enter a cafe, shop or restaurant without searching for it and checking myself in. Even better, last time I was in London it helped me find a nice little pub where I spent an enjoyable morning before a tedious game of football (Brentford 0-0 Leeds).

For Finding My Way Home: Google Maps

Hands up all those of you who’ve found yourselves trying to decode a public information map at 3am, after a skinful. Just me? Fine. Well, instead of paying 90 odd quid to turn an iPhone or HTC phone into a TomTom, you can just use Google Maps. Installed as standard, the directions function works in real time, allowing you to navigate around. Ok, you couldn’t use it if you were driving as there’s no audio, but it’s perfectly fine for pedestrians. The only drawback is the power drain. it requires lots of processing power – and that’ll drain your battery.

For Keeping Myself Entertained on Dark Nights: Google Sky Map

What, you were expecting some sort of random boob picture generator? Unfortunately I couldn’t find one, so I have to content myself with a little bit of stargazing. Any app that lets me point my phone at a bright dot in the sky and then tells me what it is has to make my list. Plus it helps me look clever in front of the Mrs. A word of warning though – it has the same power issues as Google Maps, as it needs GPS and an internet connection.

If you’ve got an app you think I should try out, any feedback on the ones I like, or you just want to ask what this post has to do with anything, let me know in the comments section. Otherwise check back soon for something about SEO or copywriting. You know. The usual schtick.