Unmemorable Title » Blogging

Are The Evils of Modern Football Ruining Your Blog?

Andrew — Wed, 01 Sep 2010 20:00:20 +0000

Don't let Football's Evils harm your blog

Football. It’s a lot like blogging. It used to be the hobby of various undesirables who spent their weekends locked in running battles throughout the town centres, now it’s the preserve of reasonable professionals with Sky TV subscriptions.

Ok, maybe blogging never had the same hooligan problem as association football. But it is suffering from the same modern maladies as the beautiful game. There might be less diving, no referees to argue with and a lack of salmonella-ridden pies, but you’d better beware of the following footballing evils.

Tim Lovejoy

Tim Lovejoy. The archetypical modern football fan. Doesn’t understand the game, doesn’t go to matches, doesn’t have the foggiest idea what the words burbling out of his smug face actually mean. He represents the first of football’s evils. Falsely assuming a position of authority.

If you’ve set yourself up as the leading mind in your field, the go-to-gal in your niche or the mastermind of your very own specialist subject, you’d better be able to back it up. Otherwise you’ll be found out. You’ll claim that Johan Cruyff is your favourite ever player, then admit to never having seen him kick a ball. And you’ll look like a fool. And people will stop taking you seriously.

After that, you’ll end up lurking on some cookery forum, trying to rebuild your reputation.

The Hype Machine

Ever watched Sky Sports News? Every single development is EARTH SHATTERING. Whether it’s Wayne Rooney ruling himself out of international duty due to an ingrowing nose hair, or the latest from Stoke City 0-0 Birmingham City, they’ll pretend it’s the biggest event since a few Germans decided to have an impromptu sledgehammer and re-unification soiree.

Don’t fall into this trap yourself. Not every development is a game changer. If you stand on the rooftops hailing the next Yahoo Meme as a guaranteed Twitter killer, or proclaim to the masses that Google Wave has rendered email obsolete, you’ll look like a berk. Don’t get egg on your chin. Stay sane and sensible, and don’t install a news ticker on your blog.

History Began in 1992

Despite what Sky want you to think, history didn’t begin in 1992. Liverpool aren’t a small club because they’ve “Never Won The Premiership(tm)” – they won every other league title for two decades.

Likewise, you deciding that “blogging is all about talking to your audience” isn’t as groundbreaking as you think. That was true of magazines, books, Roman graffiti and prehistoric cave art. Just because the packaging has changed doesn’t mean the product is significantly different. Bear that in mind, or people with long memories will start to lose confidence in you.

Money

Talk to any football fan, and sooner or later the conversation will turn to money. Wages, transfer fees, debts – these are now as prevalent in pub conversations as goals, tackles and why singing the national anthem REALLY LOUDLY is the key to international success. And it’s boring.

Likewise, when you spend every second paragraph hawking your wares, plugging your affiliates or telling us how much you charge per word, you’re going to bore people. So keep it to a reasonable level. Money ruined football – don’t let it ruin your blog too.

Manchester United

I admit, I’ve got nothing for this one. I just wanted to use the picture.

If it wasn’t clichéd, Andy would apologise for not posting in August, citing back to back illnesses and the start of the football season. But it is clichéd, so he’ll just suggest you follow him on Twitter.

How Long Does a Blog Post Need to Be?

Andrew — Fri, 06 Aug 2010 13:00:02 +0000

Image by Michael David Pedersen

Does a blog post need to be thousands of words long, pre-empting every potential query?

No. A blog post only needs to be long enough to get your point across. And not a word longer.

The Golden Rule of Blogging

Andrew — Wed, 21 Jul 2010 13:00:35 +0000

“Speak to your audience. Give your readers what they want. Keep it brief. Rule of three…”

Yeah. Enlightening. You’ve heard all of that before, haven’t you? Hundreds of times. The closely guarded secrets of the superstar bloggers. Secrets so secretive, that you read them thirty times a week on sixteen different blogs.

Well if you’re expecting this all-new GOLDEN RULE OF BLOGGING to be something along those lines, you’re going to be surprised. Because here’s something that’s 99% certain not to have been featured on Copyblogger.

“Stop Pissing About and Write“

See? I told you that wouldn’t have been on Copyblogger.

But it is the Golden Rule of Blogging. And now I’m going to tell you why.

You may have noticed that the amount of posts on Unmemorable Title has tailed off recently. It’s not because I’m suddenly less productive, or that I’m out of ideas. It’s because I’m very busy. Which means that all of my half baked ideas end up scribbled on the back of receipts or the back of my hand.

And then I never do anything about them until a day or two later. By which time I’ve forgotten half of the brilliant idea that made the post worth writing, and end up with a generic “remember, talk to your audience, kids!” post. Which really isn’t going to enrich your life. So I delete it and do something else.

Until an idea strikes! And I repeat the whole sorry process ad nauseum.

Strike While the Iron is Hot!

Don’t get caught in the same cycle of having to discard decent ideas. It’s all too easy for that fantastic notion that’s bubbling away in your brain to become stale, moth-eaten and barely worth the synaptic space.

If you don’t have time to write a full blog post, grab a notebook, or any piece of paper larger than a receipt, and scribble away. Titles, outlines, good sentences, ideas for subheadings. Get as much of it down as you can.

Then make a date. Put aside an hour or two of your time to write the thing up, and then half an hour to proofread. But make sure you set a deadline. If that idea’s not part of a post within 48 hours, you’ve missed your chance.

And then you end up pretending that a self-admonishing criticism of your inability to post regularly is a golden rule of blogging.

So what are you waiting for? Stop pissing about and write something!

Practise your writing – leave a comment below. And don’t forget to follow me on Twitter.

Guest Post: No Running, No Diving and No Heavy Linking

TomMason — Mon, 07 Jun 2010 19:28:20 +0000

Being offered a guest post can be a confusing situation.

It’s like going into someone’s home for the first time; you’re not quite sure about the house etiquette. Should I take my shoes off in the hall? Where do I put my coat? Which chair should I sit in?

With social etiquette very much in mind, I’ve been carefully considering some guidelines for my inaugural appearance on Unmemorable Title.

Courting controversy

First of all, you can’t be too controversial. This isn’t my blog and I wouldn’t want to blight Andrew’s solid reputation as a copywriter by preaching about the death of SEO or some other widely exaggerated claim.

However, you don’t want to be too PC. No one wants to read 500 blah-blah words on how Google loves keyword-rich content. You’ll get bored. I’ll get bored. It’s just not that interesting.

Quality control

Furthermore, there’s an issue of standards. Andrew runs a tight ship here at Unmemorable Title and there’s a lot of excellent content lurking around these WordPress halls. In short, he’s got some SEO game.

As a guest blogger, you want to be able to justify your invitation. Knocking out three hundred words while you’re waiting for the rice to boil on the hob just isn’t good enough. A guest post needs to be insightful, witty and, crucially, entertaining. If only for the fact you’d like readers to subscribe to your own blog when they’re done digesting your digital cameo.

But then again, you don’t want to put too much effort into it. Why spend hours crafting a blog which isn’t going to benefit your own corner of the internet? Let’s say you create the Mona Lisa of guest posts; your greatest work as an SEO copywriter which pulls in ‘href’ juice from around the globe.

Congratulations. But wouldn’t you rather have all those juicy recommendations for your own site? It’s a tough one.

Coffee and after-dinner mints

Finally – and most importantly – you can’t outstay your welcome. There’s nothing worse than a guest blog trying to soak up the limelight with a 1,000 word essay. You’re a special guest star, not a listed cast member. Wrap it up, thank the host and courteously suggest readers pop by your site if they want to read more of your work.

Thanks Andrew.

You can read more of Tom Mason’s thoughts on SEO and social media over on Manchester SEO.

How Not to Get a Comment Approved

Andrew — Wed, 26 May 2010 17:54:03 +0000

I’m fine with people leaving comments here because they want a link, so long as they contribute to the conversation. However, if you’re just copy and pasting from a generic template, you’re not getting added.

If you copy and paste in your multiple choice template and forget to delete as applicable, you won’t get a link and I may take the mickey slightly.

“Love it, it’s {sites|posts|web sites|blogs| like this that makes the internet|net so awesome|good|great”

Cheers for that chief. Filling the Net with crap, one comment at a time.

You Really Shouldn’t Be Blogging

Andrew — Tue, 27 Apr 2010 20:52:15 +0000

Photo by Brainware 3000

Common wisdom across the Blogosphere is that you should be blogging. All the time. If you’re not creating reams of content regularly, then your readers are going to desert you, RSS subscribers will throw in the towel and the search engine spiders will retreat to less dusty corners of the web.

This is of course, rubbish. Because guess what? You really shouldn’t be blogging.

Why You Shouldn’t Be Blogging

Of course, I’m not suggesting that you shut down your blog, uninstall WordPress and sell your domain name. But blogging when you have good reason not to can do you more harm than good.

Content Isn’t King

Every single piece of SEO advice you’ve ever read has told you that content is king. Every single piece of SEO advice you’ve ever read has missed the point.

Not all content is created equal, and not all content has a claim to the throne. Good Quality Content is the key to your readers’ hearts, and what the search engines want to see. If you’re not providing that, then in all honesty, you probably shouldn’t bother.

There Is Such Thing As A Valid Excuse

You might not ever have admitted this to yourself. It might be a huge leap for you. But it’s OK. We’ll do it together. Deep breaths. Are you ready? On three. One…

Two…

Three. There will always be times when you just can’t face putting a post together, and that is not an issue.

See, that’s not so scary, is it? Whether you’re stressed out with paid work, have pressing family issues, or just want to curl up on the couch with a kitten and a glass of whisky, there are always things that’ll be more important than your blog. So do them. And once you’ve cleared your mind, you can approach your blog with fresh ideas. What you don’t want to do is try and power through…

Your Readers Deserve Better

… because your readers will notice. They’ll see that you’re not putting out work of your normal high standards. And then one of two things will happen.

If you’ve been using Twitter properly, then you’ll have a core of readers from your niche who’ll spot something’s not up and offer their advice and assistance. They might even send you a guest post or two to tide you over.

However, most of your readers – the ones who just read your efforts without getting involved – will decide that they’re bored. And if they’re bored, they won’t read.

And the search engines won’t be impressed either. Sure, so long as you’re not scraping and stealing, you won’t be hit with any penalties. But if you’re not producing good content, people won’t link to you. And that’s not doing your SEO any good.

So do yourself a favour. Know when you shouldn’t be blogging, and don’t blog. Take some time off, recharge your batteries, and come back strong. Just don’t draw attention to your hiatus with a post that’s a thinly veiled attempt to provide an excuse for your absence.

When Andy’s not making excuses for not updating UT in three weeks, he’s writing for The FirstFound Blog, procrastinating on Twitter or writing the odd guest post here and there. Share your best excuses in the comments thread.

Can You Afford to Work For Free?

Andrew — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 13:31:12 +0000

It may surprise, shock and appall you to read this, but I don’t spend every waking hour writing. Some of it I spend reading, working the SEO beat and wrangling kittens, but a fair chunk of it is spent on computer games.

Football Manager 10 to be specific, and managing Dinamo Vrange to be precise. So as you can appreciate I’ve spent time in various forums. What I’ve seen in my favoured forum is a situation that should serve as a warning to anyone creating content.

They’ve shown me that if you ever want to make money, you can’t afford to work for free.

For years, the team at FM-B (including Copyblogger guest Jordan Cooper) have created an invaluable guide to the game. Tactical tips and tricks distilled from their own experiences and experimentations. Every year, the updated version of the guide is released to a rapturous reception. Except this year.

Why?

Because they’ve decided that their effort should be rewarded. So they’ve slapped a price tag on it. £7.50.

Not unreasonable, you might think? I mean, how much would most copywriters charge for seventy-odd pages of well written copy that fulfils a very real need and engages with an audience perfectly?

The problem is that they’ve been offering this for free for the past few years. And while the forum stalwarts and vocal admirers have forked up the cash, the people who never comment or say thanks are coming out of the woodwork to complain.

So what does that mean for copywriters and bloggers?

It means that if you’re an established blogger looking to make some cash from your content, you need to be prepared for all those returning visitors who never comment to suddenly become very vocal and very angry. Those thousand unique hits a month aren’t going to turn into a thousand sales. Your detractors will be the minority, but you should never expect all the people who will take your advice for free to be willing to pay for it.

And if you’re a copywriter just starting out – don’t fall in to the trap of doing work for free just to get established. Always charge a fair price for fair work. People automatically link cost with quality. Why would they pay you for the sort of content you churn out for free? Especially when that guy charges a fortune. That must mean he’s far better, right?

And if you’re just a Football Manager addict who’s stumbled upon this by accident, buy FM Britain’s latest eBook. Then tell them they owe me commission.

The Secret That’ll Get Your Clients to Read to the End

Andrew — Tue, 16 Mar 2010 13:59:13 +0000

The longer you rattle on about a product or service, the more chance you have of the client getting bored. Be brief and focussed – that way you can be sure the reader is going to carry on to the end.

Kick off with an intriguing headline. Then outline the issue your product or service addresses. Once you’ve created the problem and the need in the reader’s mind, offer your solution. Then add a call-to-action, and you’re done.

Is brief always best? Share your thoughts in the comments section.

Your Blog Bores the Arse Off Me

Andrew — Thu, 14 Jan 2010 21:00:58 +0000

Photo by Andrew Nattan

Hi there. You don’t know me too well, but maybe you should. I’m your audience. I’m the guy who subscribes to your blog via RSS, retweets your posts and leaves you the odd comment. But let me tell you a secret. I’m doing those things more out of habit at the moment. Why?

Because your blog is boring me to tears. And if you don’t get a grip, then it’s over between us.

Is Your Blog Boring Your Audience?

It’s not that I don’t want to hear what you have to say, it’s that you’re just not engaging me the way you used to. And if I’m not engaged with what you have to say, then I’m not going to do what you want me to. But don’t worry. We’re going to work things out. I’m going to show you where you’re going wrong, and you’ll thank me for it when you see more subscribers, more retweets and more comments.

Could You At Least Look Like You’re Making An Effort?

Let me share this with you first. When I’m scanning my RSS feed, or clicking onto a link I’ve been sent, I’m not going to be drawn in by a wall of text.

Give me something that attracts my attention. A picture will do. It doesn’t have to be a work of art, just something that’s appropriate to your headline and that stands out. If you’re lucky, you’ll have something like that lying around. A picture of a bored-looking friend perhaps?

If not, what’s stopping you heading over to Flickr? There are people there just dying to get their work seen.

Take five minutes to find the right picture. It’ll work wonders when it comes to the all-important first glance.

It’s Not You. It’s Me.

It really is all about me. Sure, share your thoughts and opinions with me. I like that. But don’t just talk yourself. Talk to me directly. Address me. Communicate with me.

And you know what’s worse than when you only talk about yourself? When you don’t talk about anyone. When you tell me what’s good for “bloggers“, or “readers” or “the man on the street“.

If I feel like you’re talking with me, I’m more likely to talk back.

My Time Is Precious

I appreciate that you’ve got lots to say, but I don’t have the time to read your five thousand word treatise on the future of SEO, or your novella on copywriting mistakes.

I’ll tell you what does impress me though – concise articles that are packed to bursting with information, advice and ideas. If you can condense all that wonderful content down into a bite-sized chunk, I’ll love you for it.

Keep what you need to say brief, and I’ll read to the end. The less time I need to spend reading and dissecting your post, the more time I’ll have to tell all my friends that what you have to say is worth reading.

So Then? Can We Give This Another Go?

So now I’ve got that off my chest, what do you say? Will you catch my eye with some illuminating illustrations? Will you engage me in conversations instead of lecturing me from the pulpit? Will you keep it short and to the point, so I’ve got the time to read what you’ve worked so hard to write?

If you do, I promise I’ll be a better reader. I’ll subscribe, I’ll promote and I’ll talk back.

Just let me know. What do you say?

New Years Resolutions for 2010

Andrew — Thu, 31 Dec 2009 17:21:44 +0000

Photo by dcJohn

Well, New Year’s finally here, and with but a few hours left of this decade, I’d like to take this opportunity to announce my New Year’s Resolutions. Please feel free to disregard them, as they’ll inevitably be abandoned by the time my hangover clears some time next year.

Shed the (Word) Flab

Brevity is a virtue, and one that I just don’t have the hang of. Too often, my rambling posts top 800 words. No more! From tomorrow, I’ll be imposing a 600 word limit on my posts. Less filler, more incisive insights.

Less Procrastination

You all know what I mean. Less blogging when I should be working, less thumb-twiddling when I should be blogging and much less computer gaming when I should be doing anything else!

More Community Spirit

I don’t comment on enough blogs, or retweet enough of your wonderful wit and wisdom. In 2010, I’ll try and get more involved, especially with those of you kind enough to leave me comments, feedback and encouragement.

So, there you have it. My resolutions. And because it’s the end of the decade and we’re supposed to be all misty-eyed and retrospective, I’d like to share my two favourite bits of feedback from the last decade.

Not entirely historically accurate, but at least it’s well written. Perhaps you’d be better pursuing a career as a writer or satirist instead of becoming a historian?

Louise Fawn, my A-Level History Tutor

At least I’m funny. [He's] just throwing shit around, hoping someone will notice.

Lisa Barone of Outspoken Media

Happy New Year everyone!