Saturday April 16th, 2011
A man stands outside a rather dull cocktail bar in Stevenson Square, Manchester. He looks like the sort of man who’s spent half the day watching Leeds United fail to defend, and the other half drinking Tetley bitter and £7 Caprinhas.
He’s not alone. With him is a put upon woman, staring into the middle distance and nodding at random, as the man gibbers inanely about how “just because [her] friend is writing a novel, that doesn’t mean he’s not the best writer in the bar, damn it.”
Crouched behind them, the barman scribbles on a board with a piece of chalk.
We strive to deliver the fastest service in town. No matter how long it takes.
Our hero turns, regards the board with a critical eye.
“You’ve done that wrong.”
“Eh?”
“Drop the ‘strive to’, just say ‘we deliver’.”
“I’ve written it now though mate.”
“Yeah, but you’ve written it wrong. Pass me the chalk.”
“No.”
The woman tugs insistently at the man’s sleeve, as the barman looks hopefully towards a smirking bouncer. Our frazzled writer is dragged inside. Drinking recommences.
Ten minutes later, he’s back outside with a piece of tissue. He stoops down, rubs out two words and stumbles out into the night.
We deliver the fastest service in town. No matter how long it takes.
I think when you’re amending signs outside pubs, you could probably do with a break.
I’ll be doing a piece on the Royal Wedding and wedding copy cliches on Monday, but after that I’ll be taking a short break to try and lose some of the crazy.
Enjoy the Easter bank holidays!
5 comments
Mark says:
Apr 20, 2011
lmao
Andrew says:
Apr 20, 2011
I don’t think the barman was too impressed…
Ralph Ferrett says:
Apr 20, 2011
Ha ha!
I guess having the line between work and hobby blurred is likley to cause such problems.
Hope you aint gon too long.
Ralph Ferrett´s last [type] ..I have got an article published on Labour List today
Tom Albrighton says:
Apr 21, 2011
The thing is, I actively cultivate the habit of critiquing all the stuff I see. Which leads to (a) envy when I see brilliant things, and (b) borderline insanity when I see the same old rubbish on the side of vans etc ad infinitum. In theory, it helps me improve, but I wonder.
Blogging, for me, has become a problem. I’m not joking. Once I get an idea for a blog, I have to get it down or it won’t leave me alone. Then, almost immediately, I realise it isn’t much good – pure opinion, too unbalanced, not enough examples, etc. Then, improving it becomes an obsession too.
Enjoy your break.
Tom Albrighton´s last [type] ..Divisive copywriting
Don't Copy Copy - Be Unique | OceanCopy says:
Apr 25, 2011
[...] post was inspired by one I read on Andrew Nattan’s Blog “Unmemorable [...]